So let’s see the definition of victim mentality and how to overcome it!
Introduction: Defining Victim Mentality
When an individual is put in a situation where is facing great problems, especially when is at a very small age, this can lead to the development of a victim mentality.
Victim mentality is not just the act of seeing oneself as a victim.
It is an attitude that is often transmitted to us by the family of origin, and it’s also experiencing feelings of powerlessness and prolonged feelings of sadness.
Individuals who have victim mentality develop different ways to cope with their current situation, such as feeling sorry for themselves or suppressing their anger.
These coping mechanisms, while they may have helped at first, maybe at 5 years old, can often lead to more insecurities or deeper problems in the future if not addressed properly.
The main reason why people develop this kind of mentality in the first place is that they feel powerless when faced with something that happens to them: they feel alone against the world.
They may feel like there was nothing they could do about it at the time and this causes them to shut down, without finding other solutions.
Recently, the term “victim mentality” has been popping up more and more in social media, with reference above all to the inability to live a life of abundance and success: on social networks, they often refer to those with the victim mentality as people without a backbone, slackers that will never do anything good.
Since the victim mentality is unconscious and the affected person doesn’t do it on purpose, how do you think they might feel when reading certain things?
How to Recognize the Victim Mentality
As already mentioned, victim mentality is a mental state in which a person begins to feel that they are being victimized by the events of their life.
Every bad thing that happens to them is a sign of a malignant world out to get them, and every good thing is just a coincidence.
This kind of mindset is caused by negative interactions with other people and events in the individual’s life, and it’s also known as “fixed mindset“.
This way of thinking can have an effect on things such as self-esteem, happiness, and productivity, and it makes people feel as if the negative events of the past are a chain from which they cannot break free.
Victim mentality generally starts off as feelings of self-pity that center around past events that were traumatic or difficult to overcome.
These feelings can take many different forms such as blaming oneself for their own misfortune or feeling sorry for oneself.
In the most extreme cases, this way of thinking can lead to clinical depression or anxiety disorder.
The most common examples are when people start blaming themselves for their own misfortune or when they blame others for their unhappiness.
It’s important to not let victim mentality take over your life because it can cause significant harm in many areas of your life, including work performance and relationships with loved ones.
What are the consequences?
Victimhood is bad for you and those around you.
It leads to unhealthy thoughts and actions.
Here are some of the consequences:
- A victim mentality will make people want to avoid you as it will make them feel helpless and frustrated which will cause them not to want to help you.
- You will start blaming other people for your problems instead of taking responsibility for them which means that you won’t be able to solve the problem.
- A victim mentality will develop into an abuse cycle as it is related to low self-esteem which is often the reason why people stay in abusive relationships.
English therapist Marisa Peer claims that victimhood is closely related to not feeling enough, and that when you manage to regain your personal power, it automatically leads you to overcome this unproductive and harmful mindset.
How to Break Free From Victimhood
You need to stop blaming other people and external forces for your situation and start taking responsibility for it.
Give yourself permission to heal yourself from the victim mentality.
If you’ve been struggling with self-sabotage, there is a high chance that your mentality has played a major role. And unfortunately the more time you spend feeling like a victim, the longer you will remain stuck in this state.
You have the power to decide how you want to feel and think, and there are many things that you can do to keep yourself from being a victim.
Be grateful for what you have and speak up if something is wrong or unfair so that it can be corrected or redressed.
Another way is to avoid occupying yourself with other people’s lives, gossiping, and complaining, because these things open us up to being overwhelmed with negativity and insecurity.
When you think like a victim, you passively surrender to everything that happens to you, thinking that there are no solutions and that your life is just suffering. Instead, there is always a way to fix things! Every problem has a solution, you may even be called to find one first!
You no longer have to feel alone against the world and the rest of humanity: even if you have suffered setbacks in life, from today I want you to know that you can overcome them, you have all the skills and opportunities: today thanks to the internet you have even the opportunity to get in touch with people from all over the world, people like you, who have overcome obstacles and limits of all kinds.
Don’t allow the negative programming of your mind to keep you from being who you want.
You don’t want to come from struggle and desperation anymore, and I certainly don’t want it for you!
Is the victim mentality a problem for you? Leave me a comment below and let’s talk about it!